New at BOP: Review: Matrix Resurrections Movie Review: Moonfall Movie Reviews: Scream The #1 Movie in America November Forecast The Many Saints of Newark October Forecast New Trivia Question All site updates Share & Save   Tweet Print this column

The various dishes are almost universally awful as expected. Besh’s facial expressions as he samples the food would all make for great avatar gifs. There are a couple of inventive ideas, though. Lindsay incorporates Vienna sausage as a tribute to her father, who loves them. I do too but I had to stop buying them because Kim would make that “put that down and stop embarrassing me” face when we were out shopping. Chuy chooses creole flavors to suck up to southerner John Besh. The rest of them shove stuff on crackers or put them in soup. There is much failure in this challenge.

The bottom of the barrel in the survival pack disaster are Whitney for lack of effort, Dakota for a one dimensional sweet dish, and “Beautiful” Chris Crary for poor seasoning. Dakota knew she was screwed, but I have two other thoughts here. 1) Who is Whitney? 2) Chris C., you’re never going to get John Besh as a sugar daddy if you can’t season his meat any better than that.

The best dishes in this round are remarkably inventive given the draconian parameters. Chuy scores points with the southern flavors as expected, marking the first time in the competition he’s seemed like a quality competitor. Edward creates a gorgeous looking crabcake dish housed in a metal tin. I’m surprised this one doesn’t win, because it’s an impressive looking meal, all things considered. Lindsay’s Vienna sausage crackers and sausage is probably the only dish there that anybody would eat and it is populist as well. Lindsay wins the round for creating a meal that would make her daddy proud and thereby wins immunity and $5,000. Edward says, “That had to have been one hell of a sandwich because it looked dry as the Texas land we were standing on.” Learn to demonstrate grace in defeat, dude.

The elimination challenge for this episode is revealed and it is a good one. The chefs will cook at a progressive dinner, preparing appetizers at one home, entrées at another and desserts at the third home. The chefs are lined up and arbitrarily assigned one of the meals. Moto Chris, Paul, Whitney (seriously, who is Whitney?), Lindsay and Sarah handle the appetizers. Beverly, Chuy, Heather, Ty and Nyesha create the entrées. And Chris C., Grayson, Ed and Dakota lose the lottery and have to make the desserts. Free advice: don’t make a cake. It won’t end well.

The first step in the progressive dinner is to meet with the three couples. Some of the chefs such as Ty have familiarity with the process (he name drops Bill Gates then the camera cuts him off before he can brag more) while others lament walking into “Desperate Housewives type of homes” and cooking in their kitchens. Right on cue, Kim & Justin Whitman introduce themselves. I bet that Kim is hiding a vicodin addiction while Justin is having an affair with the yet unseen woman from the desserts meal. Just a hunch.

As an aside, the episode probably doesn’t focus on the books the way she would like, but Kimberly Schlegel Whitman has written five titles currently available on Amazon. One of them is in the top 100 in the weddings category. I do the research so that you don’t have to, people! What this means is that party planning is Mrs. Whitman’s vocation as well as her passion. The judges need to cater to her whims as the husband is just along for the ride here, even more so than normal in these situations.

Continued:       1       2       3       4       5